I have no idea what it is about debriefs that turn me into a pile of snot, tears and exposed fears, but this last one was no exception. On the Race, I cried in pretty much every debrief. I am sure my coaches and squad leaders thought I cried every day (close but not quite). For month 2 debrief, I cried because I felt so unloved and unheard by my team (was I loving and listening to them? Nope… but alas, selfishness is an ugly beast and a constant battle). For month 5...

This week marks the midway point on our trip, and we got ton spend it 8 hours away from Puerto Barrios in beautiful Antigua!!  I can’t even begin to explain how badly our team needed this time away. We were dragging, individually and as a team, leading up to this point. People commented multiple times since being here how they could sense a weight and heaviness over our team. Ministry had become more of a chore, the legalism was beginning to suffocate, and I know that I had begun to forget what I was even doing here in the first place. This trip hasn’t been easy for any of...

Today, I've felt like I'm in the middle of a really deep, really big river, about to go over a waterfall. Without a life jacket on.  I made a mistake yesterday. Not just a simple "oops, brush it off" mistake. A Big, Scary, Team Changing, Cultural mistake. And in the aftermath, I find myself in a mix of emotions. But then, while I was having my little pity party, God brought to my attention two things. 1. If there ever was a river, and if I was flailing around in it, my teammates would be standing on both sides, throwing life jackets and jumping in after me. Because we...

            This is a phrase I have become very familiar with here in Guatemala.  “Lo siento. No entiendo.” Translates to “I’m sorry. I don’t understand.” I haven’t had one conversation with a local that does not include me saying this at least once. The communication barrier has been a huge struggle for me. Like I said in my last blog, how am I supposed to share Jesus with the Guatemalans if I can’t communicate with them? I just keep thinking to myself, “If only I could ask...

           Warning: I am not the same person I was last week. This week has been full of growth. Last week I broke down. I was feeling inadequate and on the outside of my team. I pulled my leader Julian to the side and asked him to pray for me, but before that happened two of my friends, Joel and Walker, walked over and I poured my heart out to them and told them how I was feeling. They all prayed for me and spoke truth over me. After that I talked to my other leader, Glenalyn, and while talking to her I realized that I have built my view of...

Lately I’ve been trying been trying to pinpoint the moment on the World Race (life) when I stopped doing and started being. I think I found it. I think it was about the moment I decided just to be me. You can read about that moment here. The reason I’ve been pondering it is because I know what a difference it made. When I decided life was ministry (thank you Kathryn Gironimi), it freed me to just be. To stop striving and start abiding. It was such a radical difference that I’d forgotten until recently it took me nine months on the race for this shift to occur. I remember...